Pros and Cons of Daycares

For some, daycare is a solution for childcare needs, and for others it’s the very last option they want to consider. There are benefits and challenges alike that you should consider before deciding to place your child in daycare. If this decision is stressing you out, take it from an ex-daycare worker: your worries are valid, but I’m going to help you out with that today!

I have a blog post here that delves into some of the inside scoop on how daycares work and things you should know as a parent but aren’t told upfront. But for today, let’s start here with things you should consider on whether you should pay for childcare, or choose another option such as a grandparent.

Without further ado, let’s get started!

Pros of Daycare

Socialization

Peer interaction is important when building social skills. This can be difficult for many children, especially only kids. Evolutionary psychology posits that certain “habits and cognitive traits that helped your ancestors survive have likely been passed down through the generations until making their way to you” (Evolutionary Perspective in Psychology: Principles and Examples (psychcentral.com)). This simply means that we learn through our interactions with those around us. Young children absorb information like a sponge, even when you don’t realize it. This starts at birth! Children in daycare begin to learn how to navigate relationships before starting grade school, which helps them assimilate to school much better than their daycare non-attendee counterparts.

Learning group dynamics helps teach children how to cooperate with adults, or authority figures, and their peers. This helps when trying to teach young children how to follow directions, how to be an active listener, how to resolve conflicts, how to communicate effectively, collaborative problem solving, and much more!

The aforementioned leads to learning how to share, which builds positive relationships and social interactions. We want to foster compassion, generosity, and kindness early as these are concepts that do not always come naturally to children. Raising kids is much like planting a flower in the ground. You must nurture the flower with the things it will need to flourish and prune the things that will harm it’s best chance to bloom.

Likewise, empathy is a learned behavior and is often difficult for young children to comprehend. The notion that others have feelings is pretty novel for littles but very important to help strengthen their emotional intelligence. Toddlers especially struggle with thinking beyond their own feelings, wants, and needs.

Structured Environment

Children thrive on structure and stability. Some parents may not understand the importance of this as most children will give a little pushback when given boundaries. However, that show of defiance does not mean you should not teach limits and rules.

To fortify emotional, developmental, and psychological well-being, teaching children behaviors like self-discipline, good time management, and organizational skills are paramount.

Daycare is not necessarily a rigid environment, but personal and academic success certainly relies heavily on clear and concise structure and guidelines via routine and class rules or expectations.

Learning Opportunities

Most daycare centers provide some form of an educational program preparing children for school. These programs can incorporate activities that focus on cognitive, behavioral, psychological, and even physical development. Things like rudimentary literacy and numeracy, proper etiquette and manners, and potty training. Our center offered biblical teachings as it was a church-based facility but we also focused on educational endeavors such as basic ASL.

With daycare, you often get what you pay for. Some daycares do not offer anything beyond simple childcare, so always educate yourself on what is offered at the centers you are considering. It is best if you can find one that prepares your child for school, but not necessary.

Professional Caregivers

It is understandable that you want someone who is a trained professional to care for your child and daycares usually provide their teachers with training on child development, appropriate care, and proper stimulation.

Having worked in daycare, I came into contact with other regional daycares via mandatory teacher workshops and furthering education. I went into teaching after acquiring a bachelor’s degree in psychology and working in the mental health field for more than 8 years—half of which was done with adolescents. This allowed me to have knowledge of child development and early education that others did not.

However, I was pleasantly surprised to find my workplace provided training on first aide, CPR, and the basics on child development to new hires in addition to annual training center-wide to build upon employee knowledge.

Not every daycare focuses on employee education, so I would give sincere consideration to the ones that do. These people, after all, do spend significant time guiding your little one. You want someone who is well-equipped to do this.

Parental Support

Daycare allows parents to pursue their careers or further their education, but this should only be a small part of the support your daycare provides. They tell you it takes a village to raise a child, and I am here to tell you that I fully believe it. Not everyone has familial support for their children (which is a luxury I think some take for granted).

My class’s parents relied on me for keeping consistent with potty training endeavors, desirable behaviors, and even parental advice. There is no manual for raising a child so never feel embarrassed for seeking advice or help from others.

They say kids act better for people other than their parents—this can be both true and misleading. I experienced kids who went both ways. BUT daycare teachers often bond tightly to their kids (I know I sure did) and those children will often respond to their teacher much the same way they do with parents, so that consistency can be easily enforced.

My parents had peace of mind because they trusted me to care, love, and nurture their children. I took great honor in their trust in me and my capabilities. Get to know your teachers as much as you can—a good rapport and relationship with your child’s caregiver is sincerely imperative in guaranteeing your child’s wellbeing.

Autonomy & Confidence

Children sometimes have a difficult time bonding with those outside of their family unit, yet this is essential for them to be prepared for school. I once had a toddler start daycare after staying home with her mom for the first two years of her life. That poor girl cried every day, all day, for almost two months. 

I thought she would never adjust, but one day she came in with a smile and never again had a problem. Her mother reported a more independent and confident child at home.

This kind of adjustment would have impacted her learning once she entered school. Daycare can help with this tenuous transition and set your child up for future success!

Exposure to Diversity

Let’s talk for a minute about the ever-rising problem of bullying. We are seeing younger children contemplate suicide—roughly 2 million attempts annually, according to Children’s Hospitals’ website. Bullying is one of the leading reasons for this. Often parents are not preparing their children for all diversities.

Early exposure helps to normalize differences in culture, race, and those with handicaps. Daycare teachers can integrate education on these various backgrounds and promote appreciation of such.

Cons of Daycare

Cost

‘You get what you pay for’ should be the motto of daycares, because this is almost always the truth. I urge parents to remember this when weighing potential centers. You want a daycare with resources and training, and this is usually reflected in your fees. Unfortunately, this means that those who are living paycheck to paycheck (I’ve been there), daycare might be unobtainable.

Illness Exposure

This one here is the biggest reason I would possibly reconsider daycare and search for alternative childcare. My center emphasized the importance of daily cleaning and sanitization. They trained us in cleaning practices, but not every teacher made time for it or adhered to the center’s standard of cleanliness.

In addition, I cleaned and sanitized my classroom twice a day, but if one student brought in a contagious illness, it almost always spread throughout the class. Stomach bugs, croup, flu, COVID, chicken pox, RSV, etc. would spread like wildfire. Some kids are more susceptible than others and frequent illnesses plagued the parents who had to continually pull them from daycare and take them to the doctor.

Less Individual Attention

Check your daycares’ teacher-to-child ratio! I cannot stress this enough! State regulations mandate a strict ration policy but some daycares skirt around this and church-run daycares do not have to follow state regulations.

Some parents have come to me and said bluntly, “My child requires more attention than the others” or something along those lines. In daycare, you cannot have favoritism or ignore the class for one child. There is little opportunity for one-on-one attention in a group setting than if you used grandparents, a babysitter, or nanny.

Separation Anxiety

As I mentioned earlier about the little girl who had a huge problem adjusting, this separation can provoke major stress for both child and parent. This might lead to undesirable behaviors and fearfulness.

Some children develop autonomy earlier than others, but for those who struggle to be away from parents, they might suffer, especially during the initial adjustment period.

Quality Inconsistencies

I urge you to do your homework when searching for the right daycare. Talk to other parents, skim online reviews, and be candid when speaking with the director or co-director. The level of care varies between facilities and there is a positive correlation between quality and price, but not always.

Be wary to quickly put your full trust in a center because it’s pricy. Likewise, some centers that cost less can still provide great care for your little one. Parents talk, ya’ll. And they’re usually pretty frank. They are often a great resource, but with everything always take what is said with a grain of salt. You want teachers that are happy with their job, a clean environment, small teacher-to-child ratios, funds for curriculum and activities, healthy foods, etc.

Limited Flexibility

There was always that parent that got off a 3 pm but showed up 5 to 15 minutes later than the center closed. Every single day. Late fees add up. Teachers have to remain behind with this child, and the director or codirector has to remain on the premises to wait for the parent. Almost all daycares have strict hours and penalties for late pickups.

If your job has fluctuating work hours and there’s a possibility of numerous last-minute changes, daycare may not be the best fit for you.

In addition, there are pickup lists stating who can and cannot pick up a child. This is firmly enforced for safety and liability reasons. In my years as a teacher, I encountered children who had been abused by a family member, ugly custody battles, and other tense situations. We took these kinds of scenarios very seriously, and we were taught to apply this way of thinking to every child. If someone tried to pick up a student but was not on the pickup list, we absolutely would not let that child leave the premises. If you or another family member cannot consistently be there to pickup your child, you may find it difficult to find a daycare that will accommodate your needs.

Potential for Developmental Delays

This is a two-sided coin. Daycares may not stimulate your child or offer appropriate developmental activities like you can at home. However, staying home with your child possibly without adequate resources can lead to the same issue.

I have seen some daycares put kids in a room and let them run wild all day, but I was lucky enough to work at a daycare that emphasized the importance of teaching our kids and engaging with them. We had a set curriculum as young as 1 year old with age-appropriate activities scheduled throughout the day. My students learned all day long, about everything from their letters to manners and social skills.

Attachment Issues

Every choice as a parent is what you make it. Some parents who utilized daycare had a poor relationship with their children. They focused on their careers and own wants before prioritizing quality bonding time with their little ones. The parent-child attachment bond is very important, especially in those early years. If you spend half and hour with your child in the morning, leave them until the center closes 12 hours later, and then rush them through their nighttime routine, you might be damaging that important bond. Meanwhile, your child bonds more closely with their teacher, who they see for more hours.

Prioritize your child’s time. Make the time you have together count. I had parents who took half days at work to spend with their children, who kept them home on days they were off. If you make an effort, I feel strongly that your child’s bond with you will not suffer.

Contemplate your family’s circumstances, needs, and personal values. Research centers and set up tours with potential locations. Ask those hard questions. No one knows your child like you do. Does your child show signs of yearning for more socialization and learning? Knowledge is power! Gather as much information as you can about the daycares you are interested in. It’s a great solution for some and have many wonderful benefits for your child and your family. Best of luck in your search!

Reach out if you ever have any questions for an ex-daycare worker. I am always honest about my experiences and love to hear from other parents. It takes a village, ya’ll. We have to stick together!

Addressing Pediatric Suicide (childrenshospitals.org)

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